The longer we live, the greater the chances you will experience some level of trauma. The most important thing to remember is that you CAN move past this life altering experience. With experienced help and the right tools, you can learn from it and reach out to others who may be stuck in the web of trauma.  

1—Acknowledge what has happened to you. Step out of denial and live in the truth. This may sound strange, but to many, it’s easier to deny what happened than to face it. Denial is never a healthy coping mechanism. What we don’t talk about and process never gets resolved. We must embrace the truth of what occurred to begin the stages of healing. Living authentically requires fully embracing our experiences however difficult they are.    

2—Be kind to yourself and create the safe feeling of routine in your environment. Structure and routine can provide a sense of safety and predictability. This type of life planning will frame your day and bring comfort in the familiarity. Those who have experienced trauma are shocked by its invasive presence. Keep it simple to avoid being overwhelmed by life’s curveballs. Give yourself the time needed to process various aspects of how this traumatic experience has intruded and disrupted your life.  The routines created in your daily regimen build security around that which is predicable.  

3—Pray/Meditate and seek divine intervention to bring peace and comfort to your mind, body and soul.   It has been said there is nothing more comforting as praying and receiving prayer. Allow yourself to rest in the calming presence of your spiritual walk with your creator and enjoy his uncommon peace.  This gift will provide greater clarity in your decision making and outlook on every day events.  There is a comfort to the soul that rests securely in knowing that there is something far greater than the daily trials we face.    

4—Provide safeguards in the event of triggers—have people you can call to process your feelings. This can provide support as you regain control over your emotions. A supportive community of trusted friends is priceless. These will be your safe people to discuss experiences, confer, cry, pray, and enjoy life with. We are relational beings and were meant to live life together in joy and harmony. Begin to develop this area of your life if you don’t have a strong network of support people you can rely on. Relationships take time, work and consistency. The time you invest in others will be reciprocated when you are in need of a trusted friendship. This will provide spiritual, emotional, relational foundations to rest upon. There is nothing more valuable than trusted friendships. Wealthy is the person who has more than a few to count as friends.  

5—Take Time to heal, emotional trauma requires healing of mind, body and spirit just like physical trauma. Give yourself good food, exercise, fresh air, exercise and fun things to do. We take care of our cars, cell phones and pets better than we care for ourselves much of the time. A holistic approach to our health care is necessary to provide complete healing to our mind, body and spirit. Give yourself the perks you would recommend to anyone going through your experience.   Plan your meals so you can eat healthy food, build in a regular exercise routine, take walks and go outdoors to see beautiful scenery, schedule fun activities with friends to give you something enjoyable to look forward to. We all need to have things on our calendar to know something fun and different from our daily routine awaits us.  

6—Forgive the person or situation that caused the harm. Forgiveness can give you a new perspective and remove a cloud of constant negativity, anger and rage. This can be considered a major step for some and provides a huge sense of relief. Forgiveness releases us from carrying around the heavy baggage of anger, regret, fear, rage and other negative emotions. There is an inexplicable freedom when releasing the stronghold of blame and disappointment someone else caused. It doesn’t negate the truth of the damage they caused but it releases us from dragging around all the negative attitudes that come with unforgiveness.  

7—Journaling is a therapeutic way to process feelings and focus on what you are grateful for. Change your focus and start looking at what is good in your life. You will be genuinely surprised at how much you have been missing by not writing down what you are grateful for. Once I started writing down the things I was grateful for each day, I was amazed at how many good things were going on around me. Now my gratitude entries are longer and longer. It may be that now I have eyes to see all the incredible blessings that occur each day. Grab a journal for someone else and include them in the joy of giving.  

8—Empower yourself with understanding your rights and pursue legal action if needed. You may have a criminal or civil case that can remedy your physical or emotional pain. Seek legal advice regarding your rights and pursue justice within our court system. There is compensation for a wrong that has illegally occurred. You may be entitled to added compensation for your pain and suffering.  

9—Join a community of advocates that are fighting for legislation or some way to protect others from facing a similar harm. Taking positive action is part of your healing. There are so many organizations that are making constructive changes for those who have been victimized. Research groups in your area you can join and participate to make a difference. You will not only feel empowered but will meet wonderful people who care about the same causes that motivate you. You will make a difference by seeking to take ownership of the problem that consumes you and turn it around for good.  

10—Seek a Professional Life Coach who specializes in trauma or a licensed therapist to guide you through your healing journey. We heal in relationship with those we trust. This is the case with selecting a Certified Life Coach. Do your homework and find one with experience in your area of concern. Having a complimentary coaching call helps to access if it’s a good fit for both you and your prospective Life Coach. If you would like to schedule a call with me go to www.calendly.com/sallybetters. I can’t wait to meet you.

By: Sally Betters, Certified Life Coach